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Disclaimer<\/strong>: This is a grumpy post. I’m deprived of daylight\/sunlight, and not feeling great about it. I’m fully aware that what I’m about to express is all related to first world problems. I know I have a lot to be thankful for, and I am. Sometimes you just have to get it out. Thanks for understanding.<\/p>\nMy house is a mess. My Christmas tree is naked. My attic has half a floor and my upstairs is covered in dust from the attic. I told Benne that I would decorate the tree this afternoon. Last night, he went to get all the decorations from the attic, only to find that they were also covered in a thick<\/strong> layer of plaster dust. ‘How are we going to get that off?’ I asked. ‘With the dust-broom I think it should work.’ He put the decorations in the shed so they wouldn’t be dusting up the living room. Today it’s pouring rain, and windy. The tree is still naked: you can’t really dust stuff off in the rain. Meanwhile, I’m supposed to be happily working along on this bakingbook project…that at the moment has lost its magic for me. I know the magic will come back. That spark of internal motivation comes at goes. At the moment it’s gone, baby.<\/p>\n Maybe it has to do with that fact that we’ve arrived in the depths of what the Dutch call de donkere maanden <\/em>or the dark months…months of darkness sounds more gloomy, so I’ll use that. It doesn’t get light until 9:00…and then ‘getting light’ is being generous. During the day, the sky stays a hazy gray color that’s so stark that it hurts your eyes. Then around 15:00 (3pm) the gray color turns grayish purple, and it starts getting dark again. This, combined with cold wind and big splattering drops of rain is what I have going on today. During this time of the year, it starts to feel like you live in a cave.<\/p>\n